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Write a screenplay/story for Jim

Jim Carrey discussion on non-movie related topics or topics which doesn't fit anywhere else...

Postby FunnyGirl » Tue May 10, 2005 5:01 am

OK here we go. Obviously this is not working out so well, so we either have:

Holly's story: Happy-go-lucky singing bum John turns big opera star
Lammy's story: Geeky donut shop owner who also sings

Since Holly is the original author she should have some say in what goes on so what if we tried..

John's character: Bum with dog who aspires to be a singer but works at a corner donut shop going out of business. Discovered singing in an alley next to the opera house, becomes famous rich opera singer. Julia is impressed and falls for him, until financial scandal leaves John back on the streets...

For me.. not working..? To drastic. Reminds me too much of "The Jerk's" rags to riches story. Lets have him sing, but maybe we should forget the opera house. Or we should have the dog do something. What if

John bought a collar for the dog, and the dog ran away and got lost. So the drunk record company boss makes the bet and the dog runs in. Being serious, he reads the address on the collar, follows it, and comes to the either nicely furnished cardboard box John is living in, or the small apartment room where John is singing in the shower. And Lammy, he is singing "Downtown" ("downtown, where all the lights are bright; downtown, everything's waiting for you") very loudly and opera-like. The drunk record company owner bangs on the door, and embarrassed John stumbles to the door with robe. POOF- failing donut shop owner to rich opera star!!..........................................................................


um.......... you help me out with this......
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Postby mav » Tue May 10, 2005 1:37 pm

FunnyGirl, I like the last paragraph. That would gel into the story.

So Greenville is actually a New York suburb:), close to New York City.....cuz that's where the opera is, right ?

A little more build up I wrote......

John wasn't sure why he chose Greenville, he'd just heard someone mention it back in his village and having nothing to lose, decided to make a go. His celery farming business wasn't going anywhere and his brother Jack would be able to handle the hard but ultimately unchallenging and not to mention meagre-paying job. So he bid his village adieu and arrived in Greenville a year back, just a backpack, but hopes nevertheless of making it happen. After paying off the cab and walking
around the new town looking for a place to stay, where should he decide to take a lunch but the Summerfields Place!

Mr Summerfield noticed the young guy at the table and could make out that he was new to the place from the quick glances he gave to everything around him and the backpack by his side. He approached him later and found that John had no definite plans of stay or work and did not know a soul in Greenville. Mr Summerfield rather liked this young man who had an air of openness and sincerity about him. He fished out an address of an acquaintance who had a plumbing business, and told John he would have no problem getting hired. And so started the first in a series of jobs - a plumbing apprentice. *this can be made amusing* It took John no time to get a hang of the plumbing skills but as he was wont to, soon got bored of it and when PizzaHouse was hiring for drivers, he jumped at the chance for a change. That was when he came into knowledge of Micheal Moore ..... oops ......Phil Moore, a franchisee of PizzaHouse and whose shop infact was a block down from the Summerfield's. *We'll come to him later* John rather enjoyed this drivers job, and would sing of old songs he'd heard before, or sing along with the radio while driving. Since he had no audience, he wasn't aware that the perfect pitch he possessed could be the envy of some as also the pleasure of many. His only audience was Woof, who would punctuate his
master's melody with a bark or two. So sing John did, and deliver pizza's he did, for precisely four months. That is when the 'Hiring Now' sign outside Carmen cookies caught his attention and he thought it would be fun to work at a cookie and cafe place. He liked the girls who worked with him, baking cookies and attending the cash registers, listening to their girly gossip, when one of the girls, Helen, found him humming a tune to the cookies and asked him to sing aloud. John shied at first, but some pleas later relented and sang one of his favorites *name please*. The claps were highly encouraging and much to the delight of the girls and not to mention the customers, he would entertain the shop with blithe numbers, sometimes accompanied by a little jive that evoked peals of delight from onlookers. What would look like a distraction to the business actually wasn't, as more and more customer's were attracted to the 'cookie shop where John sings'.

John would drop by on and off to see Mr Summerfield, who he looked up to as a mentor. He also secretly delighted in meeting Julia, and hoped she would still be at work when he came. For some reason, he couldn't bring himself to go beyond the cursory conversations, and even though they shared an easy bantering, couldn't spell the true words of his heart to her. Maybe the fact that he only still lived in a one room rental and the most he could afford was a new bicycle was to blame for it. And to top it all, Phil, (remember, the PizzaHouse franchisee, a few shops down) only recently had started frequenting the restaurant and working his suaveness on Mr Summerfield. John's distress knew no bounds when he saw that beneath his friendly demeanor and politeness, Phil was actually coveting Julia! Julia, on her part, actually liked John, but it was not missed on her that Phil spelled s-t-a-b-i-l-i-t-y.

Stranger things have happened when one least expects it. And such an unexpected event would come to pass John......*here we describe the Opera owner, comes at the cookie place, and notices John singing, once-in-a-lifetime offer etc. So feel free to make changes and add, elaborate the story*

holly - I know my story does not have the tramp part that you originally suggested, but I've tried to make him sufficiently poor :)
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Postby lammy » Tue May 10, 2005 2:50 pm

:(

I don't think we are going to agree on a plot here.... :(

Oh well.

I tried!
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Postby Clemmy » Tue May 10, 2005 2:51 pm

I like it... It sounds like a good 5-minute pitch...
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Postby lammy » Tue May 10, 2005 2:57 pm

Clemmy wrote:I like it... It sounds like a good 5-minute pitch...


You like what?
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Postby mav » Tue May 10, 2005 3:57 pm

Thanks Clemmy!

Lammy - The central theme is still the same, the one that holly suggested. Down-on-his-luck happy-go-lucky guy becomes an opera star......
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Postby quirky » Tue May 10, 2005 4:13 pm

I, too, am crushed that there are no arias atop Galapagos turtles. :wink:
"When in doubt, tell the truth."
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Postby fluffy » Tue May 10, 2005 5:05 pm

or donkeys.............i was hoping for at least one..... :wink:

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Postby FunnyGirl » Tue May 10, 2005 5:55 pm

hm... No I don't think this is going anywhere.. Maybe we should start over and play the game on holly's rules, and just keep adding a paragraph.. :?: Seems like everyone wants their own story..
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Postby lammy » Tue May 10, 2005 6:28 pm

FunnyGirl wrote:hm... No I don't think this is going anywhere.. Maybe we should start over and play the game on holly's rules, and just keep adding a paragraph.. :?: Seems like everyone wants their own story..


I was attempting do do such thing... :(
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Postby mav » Tue May 10, 2005 7:00 pm

Hey, it's just my version. :) Ok, let's wait for holly to start.....
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the plot thickens..

Postby wonderbunny » Tue May 10, 2005 7:23 pm

Soft spoken and gentle Julia begins the conversation with concerns as to where the two live. Knowing he is down on his luck and needing some repairs to her roof, she offers him a job and a place to sleep in the granny unit located adjacent to her home. Ordinarily she would not offer a stranger into her home, but from the minute the began to speak. She found him charming, and intent on finding employment. The job wouldn't last very long but it would give the kind stranger and his dog a place to sleep because it was unusually cold for this time of year.
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Postby fluffy » Tue May 10, 2005 9:27 pm

that's nice............ :D
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Postby mav » Tue May 10, 2005 9:35 pm

wonderbunny - it sounds good. You are fleshing out Julia's character, which I didn't........ :)
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Postby quirky » Wed May 11, 2005 4:09 am

Clemmy wrote:I like it... It sounds like a good 5-minute pitch...


I didn't know anyone could throw that slow.
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