Eternal Truths

[Jim Carrey Fan 4Lyfe]

1.) Once over the hill, you pick up speed.<br><br>2.) I love cooking with wine. Sometimes I even put it in the food.<br><br>3.) If it weren't for STRESS I'd have no energy at all. <br><br>4.) Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed. <br><br>5.) Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.<br><br>6.) I know God won't give me more than I can handle. I just wish He didn't trust me so much.<br><br>7.) Dogs have owners. Cats have staff.<br><br>8.) We cannot change the direction of the wind...but we can adjust the sails.<br><br>9.) Some days are a total waste of makeup.<br><br>10.) Do you believe in love at first sight .. or should I walk by you again? <br><br>11.) If the shoe fits......buy it in every colour.<br><br>12.) If you're too open minded, your brains will fall out. <br><br>13.) Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.<br><br>14.) Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.<br><br>15.) Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.<br><br>16.) If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before.<br><br>17.) My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance. <br><br>18.) Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.<br><br>19.) It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.<br><br>20.) For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program.<br><br>21.) If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip. <br><br>22.) Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of cheques.<br><br>23.) A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.<br><br>24.) Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.<br><br>25.) A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand. <br><br>26.) Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.<br><br>27.) Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.<br><br>28.) Junk is something you've kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.<br><br>29.) There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.<br><br>30.) Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.<br><br>31.) By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.<br><br>32.) Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.<br><br>33.) Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself. <p>-----------------<br>"Bruce Giveth & Bruce Taketh. Don't Like it? Megabyte Me" -Bruce (Jim Carrey) "Bruce Almighty"<br><br><!--EZCODE BOLD START--><strong>Grace</strong><!--EZCODE BOLD END-->: I've never seen the moon so big. <br><!--EZCODE BOLD START--><strong>Bruce</strong><!--EZCODE BOLD END-->: We really shouldn't waste it. <br><!--EZCODE BOLD START--><strong>Grace</strong><!--EZCODE BOLD END-->: I've got a rare blood type. I'm AB positive. <br><!--EZCODE BOLD START--><strong>Bruce</strong><!--EZCODE BOLD END-->: I'm IB positive. I be positive they ain't stickin' no needle in me. <br><br>Check Out The <!--EZCODE LINK START--><a href="http://www.angelfire.com/celeb2/jimcarreyrules" target="top">Jim Carrey Land USA Website</a><!--EZCODE LINK END--> & My <!--EZCODE LINK START--><a href="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Jim_Carrey_Online/" target="top">Jim Carrey Online Group</a><!--EZCODE LINK END--> & The <!--EZCODE LINK START--><a href="http://invisionfree.com/forums/JimCarreyOnlineUSA//" target="top">Jim Carrey Land USA Website's Fan Forum</a><!--EZCODE LINK END-->!</p><i>Edited by: <A HREF=http://pub76.ezboard.com/bjcomessageboard.showUserPublicProfile?gid=jimcarreyfan4lyfe>Jim Carrey Fan 4Lyfe</A>  <IMG HEIGHT=10 WIDTH=10 SRC="http://www.gamespy.com/avatars/av/MR/mr482.gif" BORDER=0> at: 6/24/03 8:31 pm<br></i>

[Miss Dante]

<!--EZCODE EMOTICON START :lol --><img src=http://www.ezboard.com/images/emoticons/laugh.gif ALT=":lol"><!--EZCODE EMOTICON END--> <br><br>I liked numbers 7, 14 (that made me laugh out loud at my monitor <!--EZCODE EMOTICON START :rollin --><img src=http://www.ezboard.com/images/emoticons/roll.gif ALT=":rollin"><!--EZCODE EMOTICON END--> ) and 28, as the amount of times I've been ruthless with trash only to need it a week later is unreal! On the plus side though, trash clearance can result in bonuses like finding your favourite lipstick next to the broken computer speakers under your desk, like I just did about two seconds ago! Hurrah!! <br><br>Hel x <!--EZCODE EMOTICON START :smokin --><img src=http://www.ezboard.com/images/emoticons/smokin.gif ALT=":smokin"><!--EZCODE EMOTICON END--> <p>'I don't have to take this abuse from you, I've got hundreds of people dying to abuse me.'Bill Murray, Ghostbusters<br></p><i></i>

[Nevrandil]

Yeah ..these things are soo true!! haha ..I love 10, 11, 12.. ..ah I love them all.. haha .. <p></p><i></i>